Why do people choose me as their therapist and who works well with me?
Warmth
People that choose me often describe me as warm and approachable. Essential to the therapeutic process is being able to be held in a space that is comfortable enough to let go of your defenses in order to move towards the edge of uncertainty, or growth potential. I strive to create an environment where encouragement, validation, humor, and safety act as the container for you to explore a healthier way of living in order to grow.
Directness
Utilizing warmth to create the space for growth to have potential, I am also described as a fairly direct therapist. I use directness in how I communicate my observations, your progress, and I actively challenge (strategically and warmly) distorted beliefs and emotional thinking that cloud the pathway to your goals. My goal is to provide a mirror to you that is as accurate as possible so you can identify unhelpful thoughts/feelings/behavioral patterns in order to live a more aware and authentic life with a clear direction in mind. We need to know what we’re experiencing in order to make decisions that have a higher probability of helping us build healthy relationships to our selves and to others.
Pragmatic
Therapy isn’t “cookbook medicine”. One size does not fit all and your unique experiences serve to shape how you relate to your life. My practice is one rooted in empirically supported research. I operate from specific frameworks to find solutions to the challenges found in life. Our work is collaborative in nature! I encourage each of my clients to actively define the progress they wish to make so that we can plan/act/measure/reengage in that growth process together. I operate from a values based perspective whereby the values YOU create for yourself will serve to define the pathway to optimal growth, the challenges you choose to face to acquire the lessons needed, what challenges can be “let go”, and to define the person you wish to embody.
“ When we go to school we’re given lessons and then tested on those lessons. In life, we’re given tests and then it’s up to us the lessons we wish to take away from those experiences” (Tom Bodett).
Process vs Outcome
The work I do with my clients starts and ends from a process focused orientation rather than outcome, which can be challenging for some. An outcome orientation lends itself to a sense of succeeding or failing (how fast, how often, how much). A process oriented approach focuses on how well a person can engage a task or activity at any given time with what that person has at their disposal, keeping in mind we all start from different set points. My approach is to meet people where they need to be met, to highlight what strengths they have to address given concerns, to harness what can be used (internally and externally) to practice challenging those difficulties within your capability level in order to push beyond what you felt you were capable of. I love it when people realize how much of a badass they really are and that they deserve a healthy, strong, sexual relationship with themselves and with others. To that end, I measure trajectory and how our efforts today surpassed yesterday so that we can have vision for tomorrow free from self imposed limits.
